personal awareness

I have learned through painful experience that partner work and physical corrections make up a potentially very sensitive subject – martial arts people will probably wonder why I am bothering to write about this at all – whereas beginners or people with no experience of interpersonal physical activity may well recoil that I even dream of writing about it – let alone speak of it as normal, when they may well find the prospect completely frightening, foreign, unnecessary, invasive and more – especially if it involves touch across the gender line. If that is you please bear with me and understand that this is one of those deeply personal subjects that spans very divergent extremes.

You may be someone who emotionally or for religious reasons avoids interpersonal contact completely – or you may be a martial artist or sports person into wrestling, dancing or similar, to whom close/intimate contact with strangers is normal, necessary and an important learning tool. So this piece is intended to address those people more toward the avoiding end of the spectrum with the hope that you may be somewhat reassured and perhaps even encouraged.

Humans are a social species with close personal contact ingrained in our psyche from ancient ancestral grooming and physical closeness in communal living. This is something our modern society has led us to draw away from in recent generations. It is also something associated with our vulnerability and our sexuality – so today many of us do not comfortably interact with close touch especially with strangers in public even in a relatively controlled group environment. Nonetheless when we see a child or adult crying (especially close family or friend) our first, and natural response is usually to make some sort of physical contact – maybe to hug, kiss or massage it better.

We need to remember our ancestral roots and the physical communication that is such a fundamental part of our species existence. Interestingly once people cross that intellectual fear barrier they generally become quite comfortable with partner work and physical correction – as they come to understand it’s benefits and how physical interaction forms an essential part of the healing and learning processes – especially with an internal art such as Tai Chi.

Personally I was brought up in a family both distant and smothering derived from post Victorian parenting – which led to a very conflicted view of this subject, but now with the perspective of martial arts training since 1971 it is really not a problem, except in judging and dealing with the extent to which students – especially female beginners – are comfortable with this vitally important aspect of Tai Chi. Issues of pain, responsibility, respect, appropriateness and intimidation are replaced by the benefits of enhanced awareness, clearer understanding, easier trust on many levels, the use of pain signals in learning and healing as well as an appreciation of how physical communication can enhance relationships by grounding and bonding the partners

Not only is touch an extremely quick way to communicate, it is also a very reliable way that can communicate many things words are completely incapable of conveying – we should remember that words after all only make up 30% of communication – visually physical and tonal voice cues generally make up the remaining 70% – until we factor in touch which often overrides all the rest – try closing your eyes and moving around a bit. It is difficult to lie with touch or physical expression, whereas words and intellectual models are not only inaccurate but make lying easy and common.

Clearly this is a much bigger subject than a few martial artists training together – if you do not include partner work in your training you will be missing out on the very core of Tai Chi and risk being blinded by lack of understanding that goes with the un-knowingness of simply not having the experience. Fears are involved here so I would strongly urge Tai Chi practitioners – actually probably everybody – to look at what is stopping them from dealing with them. If you choose not to that is fine – it is your choice, but in my view a severley limiting one.

 

 

Ian does Chen style

I was talking one day with a student about the behaviours that might be considered advantageous in a physical conflict – and gave him a homework project to think of a list of 5 or 6 – then to write about them – and of how they might also have positive aspects in constructive relationships.

In thinking about it later I gave myself the same task and came up with the following list. It then occurred to me that actually they are all facets of the same thing – each related to the others – labels with the same content seen from a different angle – each compliments the others – and indeed each has its positive aspect that would be a valuable behaviour in a caring/loving relationship. They are not good or bad – we get to choose the end to which we put our skills and seeing both aspects we get to make that very human choice of who we wish to be. Tai Chi simply provides a means of developing those skills and exploring their value.

They are in no particular order although I have in some cases grouped more closely related items together – the whole exercise is really about provoking thought.

In looking at the value of these behaviours in positive, caring and loving relationships we can usually look at the way the behaviour works in a negative way and do the opposite and so this is the format I have adopted in the following notes – first the behaviour – then the way it works in a destructive relationship like a fight – then the way it works in a creative relationship in italics. Both represent harmony in their own way – as so often in life – it is all about the intention – how the energy is directed.
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Ian Deavin performs chen style Laojia form

As a child in a post war western society of the 50’s feedback was a very hit and miss affair – sometimes literally – but rarely was there useful guidance.

It is only in recent times that the growth and popularisation of western psychology has led to study of human behaviour in anything like scientific observational terms and availability of that knowledge on a widespread basis. Perhaps it was this lack of constructive feedback that led me and many like me in the 60’s and 70’s looking to the eastern Buddhists and Taoists – early “scientific” students of the natural world – for a knowledge based approach to the human experience.

What was previously a random series of experiences and poorly understood lessons was termed the “school of life” – in fact this was a complete misnomer – there was/is very little teaching and very little learning in life skills – in fact often simply a series of falling into and negotiating traps and tests set by others followed by a struggle to recover from them.   Fortunately the knowledge we have now has the potential to greatly enhance the life learning process both externally in our social behaviours and in our internal experiences.

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One of my students has a long standing lower back condition which flared up recently to the point that his doctor thought he had slipped a disc – after a couple of weeks rest he came with a few others of the group to my teacher Karel Koskuba for a 3 hour seminar. Before we got started a couple of other students mentioned their own back problems – so we spent at least the first hour working on a very slow exercise for the back.

The other day I asked how his back problem was doing and this was the reply:

“The back is doing very well thank you.

The Karel visit really did the trick, and motivated me to get back to my training, because I was very nervous about putting any strain on my back.

The chat we had with Karel on standing triggered some thinking, as did the small slow movement over time.

As a result I was standing on Tuesday morning, and about 15 minutes in I noticed a small horizontal muscle group in my lower back was tense, I relaxed it, no idea how, and immediately the hips dropped forward. The back straitened, sciatica disappeared completely, and the tension in my right knee went.

I did 30 minutes standing and felt I could have carried on for another 30 minutes – totally relaxed.

What I’ve noticed now is that my chest is tense, not relaxed and not connected to the rest of me and feels like it’s limiting my breathing – something else to work on next.

– I haven’t had many breakthroughs as big as this and it was a bit of a shocker at the time 🙂 “

Mindfulness in Tai Chi

18 December 2015
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Mindfulness is receiving a lot of attention in “alternative” circles at the moment – but it is worth reflecting that it is, and has been, a vital component of spiritual meditation and of martial arts for centuries – helping us to link mind, body and spirit on a daily basis. For example we use the […]

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What Are Martial Arts Really About?

14 May 2015

The title question “What are Martial Arts Really about?” can be simply answered at the most basic level – survival – and left there. However it is my belief that many things flow from that simple statement. Things which do not go off the point and which are timeless in their relevance to men and women […]

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Be wary of definitive arguments

20 November 2014

In your practice be wary of definitive arguments – especially of the “my great expert said this and they must be right” variety leading to an argument about who is the greater expert – they are a distraction from the reality of internal experience. There is only one solution – use the scientific method – […]

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Tai Chi for a Good Back

17 October 2014

I thought I might pass on some personal thoughts on how Tai Chi fits into the mix of approaches to “bad back” syndrome arising from deterioration of posture and poor habits of body use. Tai Chi emphasises keeping a relaxed straight back leading to a vertical posture carried with poise. Tai Chi achieves this by […]

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Seminar – Tai Chi Exercises and Meditation @ The Letchworth Centre for Healthy Living

4 September 2014

I am really looking forward to our next one-day seminar in October covering Tai Chi related exercises and meditation – with the added benefit of Alexander Technique. The mix of meditation and movement combines to create internal awareness and understanding of our body usage – this seminar will take time to explore how we can […]

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Take one for the Team – Invest in Loss

26 July 2014

Here’s an idea – think of yourself as a committee – and your body and your mind and your spirit as sub-committees. This structure is like a team or a shoal of fish/flock of birds – but unlike any of these you do not have the option to “drop” one of the team – they […]

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